André Anthony Moore, LMFT
Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (New York State License: 001435)
Ketamine and Psychedelic Assisted Therapist certified by The Integrative Psychiatry Institute Practitioner of Eye Movement, Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR)
Use Nonverbal Sensorimotor Techniques to deepen Emotionally Focused Therapy
At Marriage Couples Counseling in New York City
I use creative metaphors from film, music and literature to embolden couples to bring Five Compassions, described by Gabor Mate in The Myth of Normal to their everyday lives:
- 1. Ordinary Human Compassion
- 2. Compassion of Curiosity
- 3. Compassion of Recognition
- 4. Compassion of Truth
- 5. Compassion of Possibility
Here’s how I used the Five Compassions in a face to face meeting with two lovers confused and trapped in their everyday mistakes and the tiny ways they hurt each other deep down that aren’t so tiny.
My job was to sense and then show them the raw spots they were triggering in each other.
I first focused on their non-verbal tells and how their feelings got played out in their bodies. There’ve been countless times when I meet with a couple that the sadness in their eyes, the pain and stress in their faces tell me a deeper, more agonizing story than the words coming out of their mouths.
I was curious and gentle. I encouraged them to slow down and feel what’s going on in their bodies. I reminded them that words are the least important way we have of expressing our deepest, most painful feelings. I also encouraged – even challenged them – to imagine what the other must be feeling and going through, without necessarily agreeing with it.
I took every opportunity to apply Gabor Mate’s Five Compassions in relating and responding to them with my openness and curiosity, my respectful tone of my voice, the softness in my eyes.
I tried to model with my own behavior how they might be more tender and compassionate with each other.
What people say about Andre Moore, LMFT
Building Therapeutic Alliances with Individuals and Couples in Psychotherapy
André Anthony Moore, LMFT
Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (New York State License: 001435)
Ketamine and Psychedelic Assisted Therapist certified by The Integrative Psychiatry Institute
Practitioner of Eye Movement, Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR)
Use Nonverbal Sensorimotor Techniques to deepen Emotionally Focused Therapy
Luciana Lopez2021-09-07Andre was really great at helping us improve our communication and get to the heart of our arguments so that we could understand each other better. Tremendously helpful!
Steven Trojanowski2021-08-27Andre is wonderful. My wife and I saw him after a terrible fight over a very charged subject. After a few months of working together with Andre a similar issue arose. Taking what we learned about each other and what we needed we were able to take what could have been an argument and turned it into a very positive conversation. He also has beautiful cats. You should go just to meet them.
Sara Howell2020-02-07Andre must be one of the most intelligent and emotionally intelligent people I have ever met. He changed my view on therapy, basically. Now I can tell anyone that "trust me, you would benefit from seeing a therapist - well, from seeing Andre, specifically". He is incredible. From the first moment we meet him - there is this sense of warmth and trust. We feel safe to open up. Andre knows so much about art, history, film, behavioral therapy, world cultures, and more - all of which he brings into the sessions and relates that knowledge to our situation/feelings. That really helps us process our feelings and understand them better. As another reviewer said, he also shares some of his personal stories, which is what makes him so genuine. On top of that, Andre is extremely emotionally intelligent - he just "gets" it. He doesn't try to preach about what we should do. If you come here looking for such answers, you will be surprised. Instead, he brings out the feelings out of us - the deep stuff from inside to the surface - and helps us understand those feelings. Very importantly, Andre has the best intentions to help couples learn how to understand each other better and support each other. As he says: "How can you really love someone if you don't fully understand them?" Now I understand my significant other much more than before. Andre is an experienced therapist and individual - truly knows his stuff - in therapy as well as in life. He takes the time to listen and understand (like during our first phone call, he spent time to hear my story before even asking me if I'd like to book the first session with him). His sessions are 1,5 hr long compared to 45 minutes elsewhere. Since seeing Andre, our lives have become normal (we were on barely speaking terms before!). Of course it takes the couples' additional effort to make things happen outside of therapy, but if you put into practice what you learn during the sessions with Andre, you will come out better than when you came in. We are so thankful to Andre. My significant other, who previously claimed he did not believe in therapy, now says he must give credit to Andre. In short, do yourselves a favor and see Andre. If you value your relationship/marriage and really need a miracle, don't hesitate. This might be your life-saving decision. As for the cat hair - yes there is a cat sitting silently on the table in the room and doesn't bother anyone. If you hate cats, look elsewhere, otherwise, chill. As for the privacy rules, you sign a paper in the first session which states that whatever you share with Andre is strictly confidential, so no worries there either. Card is accepted as a form of payment - no idea what the reviewer is saying regarding Andre making them pay cash - complete nonsense. Andre is so human (down to earth, humble), genuine, understanding, a good listener, patient, super super super intelligent & emotionally intelligent, and has the couples' best interest at heart. Andre is professional - he takes notes, and is always prepared for our sessions - I can tell because he remembers everything we talked about in the previous sessions. He is God-sent and truly a life saver. Thank you, Andre. Oh yes, and he is funny too - we laugh quite a bit during the sessions - can you imagine. :)
Joseph Horton2019-01-18I highly reccomend Andre! He is an amazing therapist. His down-to-earth style is what I enjoyed most about him. My wife and I wouldn’t be where we are today with the help of Andre. 10 stars if it were possible.
Katie Cline2019-01-16Highly recommend!
Emotionally Focused Therapy in New York
At Marriage & Couples Counseling NYC, I also use Emotionally Focused Therapy to deepen seven important conversations for lovers. These conversations are described by Sue Johnson in Hold Me Tight and are absolutely crucial for an emotionally intimate, long term relationship with your lover.
Recognizing Demon Dialogues
I will teach you to appreciate how rapidly arguments can escalate as a consequence of criticizing each other’s character, denying responsibility, insulting each other, and emotionally withdrawing. These negative ways of relating, described by social psychologist J. M. Gottman as The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse, increase the odds of getting a divorce to 85%.
Revisiting Rocky Moments
I teach you to revisit past mistakes and take charge of how you each contributed to mis-attunements and emotional disconnections. Here you get the chance to apply what you learned in conversations 1 and 2.
Forgiving Injuries
Here, I facilitate a healing dialog to encourage mutual exoneration. I encourage you to speak your pain as openly as possible, acknowledge your lover’s pain, revise your script by moving from behind your protective walls, take responsibility for how you hurt each other, identify with what your lover needs from you, and create a new and better story of your lives together.
Keeping Your Love Alive
In this last conversation, I encourage you to understand love as a language that has to be spoken again and again, to have what Sue Johnson calls ARE conversations based on Accessibility, Responsiveness and Engagement. The more you speak this language, the more easily it flows and the stronger your love will be.
Finding the Raw Spots
I teach you to get more in touch with your hypersensitivities resulting from past experiences that get triggered in the present when your lover neglects, ignores or dismisses you. These are the deeper hurts that fuel the Demon Dialogs and leave you feeling emotionally deprived or deserted by your lover.
Hold Me Tight
In this conversation I encourage and facilitate a greater feeling of emotional safety in which you step away from your past ways of protecting yourselves and build a bridge between you to find a safe haven in each other.
Bonding through Sex and Touch
Here I teach you how to move from emotionally disconnected or just partially connected sex to rich, synchronous moments in which emotional openness, responsiveness, tender touch and erotic exploration all come together.
New lovers are nervous and tender. They smash everything for their hearts are an organ of fire.
Michael Ondaatje, The English Patient
The therapist’s role in any kind of psychotherapy is to reflect back to you like a good enough parent who you really are as you delve into and discover the unfathomable, hidden parts of yourself and your lover. By committing to always be there with you, the therapist – in the words of Leonard Cohen – helps you discover: The Beauty Lost to You Yourself.
Top Marriage Counselors
Our marriage, couples, relationship counselors and therapists will inspire you to open your hearts to each other in ways you never thought possible. We’ll give you relationship tools such as The Couples Dialog, Creative Role Playing, The Five Love Languages, Turning Bad Fights into Good Fights and Poems to Love Smarter to help you cope more creatively with every day burdens, frustrations, anxiety and depression.
We’ve learned from years of experience that encouraging lovers to reveal who they really are: their simple joys, deeper fears, lingering hurts and sadness in a safe emotional setting is the only true path to greater happiness, contentment and sexual fulfillment.
Finally, for those of you who believe you’ll find the one true, perfect love in your life, please look at Why You Will Marry the Wrong Person; a delightfully humorous, engaging video. The truth is there is no such thing as finding the one true, love in life. What there really is out there are a few perfectly imperfect potential lovers who really get you and with whom you can create a rich, meaningful, satisfying life.
Our staff of creative, caring counselors and therapists (including a consulting psychiatrist – see About Us page), have over 80 years collective experience and knowledge in marriage, couples, relationship counseling and therapy, premarital counseling and relationship problem advice. We’ve helped dozens of lovers strengthen their emotional bonds and achieve happier, more fulfilling lives based on a deeper appreciation and celebration of differences.
Our services are designed exclusively for serious couples who value the importance of greater emotional intimacy and are motivated to attain it. We work with insurance companies like Harvard Pilgrim, Cigna, Aetna, Blue Cross-Blue Shield, U.S. Health Care, Guardian, Mental Health Net, etc. and obtain 50 % reimbursement of what you pay us out of pocket, often more, depending on your plan. We don’t accept GHI, HMO’s, Medicaid, Oxford or Medicare.
Marriage and Couples Counseling in New York City is in Greenwich Village
(South of Washington Square Park between Sullivan and Thompson Streets, two blocks from the campus of NYU)
160 Bleecker Street, 9C East
New York, NY 10012
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