What Is Emotionally Focused Therapy and What Benefits Does It Offer?

emotionally focused therapy

All therapy is not equal. Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) is a poignant approach to couples therapy. It offers real, lasting benefits. Emotions are keys to identifying the foundation of relationships and the intimate connection between individuals. They are what attract you to a potential partner. At the same time, emotions can derail your bond if they are intensely negative emotions. There are times where emotions conquer logic. Let’s explore Emotionally Focused Therapy for couples and its benefits in today’s post.

Explaining Emotionally Focused Therapy

Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) is a form of therapy that concentrates on a person’s emotions and their reactions to those emotions. This form of therapy came about in 1985 and was primarily developed by Leslie Greenberg. It recognizes that couples can wind up in an endless circle of emotions that bounce between each partner. EFT uses attachment theory and principles of cognitive behavior as a way to treat couples that are struggling in their relationship. Many relationships take a turn for the worse because one person has a fear of abandonment or an inability to share their emotional needs.

The Benefits of EFT

The benefits of emotionally-focused couples therapy techniques include:

  • Developing a better understanding of the needs of your partner
  • Developing a better understanding of your own needs
  • Learning how to talk about your problems using empathy without escalating the situation
  • Discovering the causes of your problems instead of symptoms
  • Learning about attachment insecurities and how you can solve them
  • Entering a successful and enduring relationship
  • Learning to transform emotions and better use the information they provide to avoid negative or harmful behaviors or other effects of certain emotions
  • Learning to use helpful emotions to guide actions towards positive outcomes
  • Learning how to communicate your emotional needs and how to listen to your partner’s

Many couples seek EFT to fix a problem they are struggling to rectify themselves and find it to be incredibly effective because it focuses not just on physical intimacy, but emotional as well. An NYC counselor can help you to focus on your emotional connection and foreground the reasons you began the relationship in the first place.

The Seven Conversations for a Lifetime of Love

emotionally-focused therapy

The emotion-focused couples therapy techniques used at Marriage Couples Counseling in New York City are the Seven Conversations for a Lifetime of Love. These seven conversations are as follows:

  • Recognizing Demon Dialogues – A conversation can escalate into negativity when you attack each other’s character, deny responsibility, place blame, sling insults, and become negative and withdrawn emotionally. 
  • Finding Raw Spots – We teach you how to get in touch with things from your past that result in your hypersensitivity when you feel ignored, dismissed, or neglected by your partner.
  • Revisiting the Rocky Moments – You revisit mistakes you made in the past and take control of how you contributed to being detached emotionally.
  • Hold Me Tight – You create a feeling of safety emotionally by building a bridge between protecting yourself and finding a safe place in your partner.
  • Forgiving Injuries – You speak as openly as possible about your pain and acknowledge the pain of your partner. We also teach you how to find out what your lover needs from you.
  • Bonding Using Touch and Sex – We teach you how to utilize responsiveness, openness, exotic exploration, and tender touch to come together as one in physical intimacy.
  • Keeping Your Love Alive – You learn how to use love as a language to have engaging, responsive, and accessible conversations.

Struggling with Emotions in Your Relationship? Call a Therapist Today

If you are struggling with emotions in your relationship, it is time to seek the help of an experienced and professional therapist that offers Emotionally Focused Therapy. Call the office of Marriage Couples Counseling in New York City at 212-673-4618 to schedule a consultation. Our Seven Conversations for a Lifetime of Love can benefit your relationship by creating a bedrock of understanding and acceptance. That can help get your relationship back on track, and keep it that way, no matter where you are at in your relationship.

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  • NAP Details:

    Marriage Couples Counseling & Life Coaching
    160 Bleecker Street, 9C East, New York, NY 10012
    (212) 673 4618